Stacy Horn

I’m waiting to hear from the vet this afternoon about Buddy’s blood and urine test results. It’s not looking good. Right now he’ll only eat baby food. For those of you who own cats, you know that is never a good sign. Maybe it’s this thing I’ve already forgotten the name of and is treatable. But maybe it’s the lymphoma finally getting the upper hand.

The results should be available after 3, I will post an update then. Tonight is the Choral Society benefit. It’s always a big, wonderful party, but getting dressed up and partying is the last thing I feel like doing.

UPDATE 5:30: It could be pancreatitis, and treatable, and not the end stages of the lymphoma. I’m starting him on antibiotics and we’ll know in three to five days. He’ll either start to get better or he won’t. Mood, better.

As always, I can’t bear the idea of life without my cat. He’s always right there.

I’ve started writing the acknowledgements for my singing book. This is the section at the back where the author thanks all the people who helped them. It’s killing me, I tell you. Why is it so hard to sound sincere, and not tedious? I’m a writer. I should be able to manage this.

I just tried for a little humor. Probably a mistake. And brevity. Also, problematic. There’s the danger of having omitted someone. Maybe I should make a video and just list the address for the video? That would at least be novel. I could sing! Yeah, no.

Flowers on a roof on Bleecker Street. They were big and pink and gorgeous and of course I wanted them to be mine. By the way, it’s pouring rain at the moment. I got to enjoy my freshly cleaned windows for what? Three days. Stupid universe. Thanks for the thunder, though.

I scrub, polish, and dust every single surface and item in the apartment, but the best and most dramatic moments are always when the window washers are done and when the rug comes back from cleaning. What does Finney do the second the rug is put back down? ATTACK. (Good god it’s everywhere. How will I prevail??)

I can never figure out how to take a picture which will show just how clean my place is. I even got under the desk and washed every wire, and tried for the nth time to make it look less like a rats nest under there (failed). I probably sound like an insane person, but yesterday I sat at my desk and worked on the copy edits. The sun was shining in my sparkling clean window, everything around me felt a little brighter, the colors more intense, and the cats were rolling around on the carpet, fed and content. Clean homes are peaceful.

The last thing is finding a nice little something for myself as a reward. In the running: a new bathing suit (but that means shopping, which I hate, so that probably won’t win) new music (a strong contender because it will only cost a few dollars) pedicure (never fails to make me feel pampered and happy) and flowers (another inexpensive pleasure).

I went out to Queens College and the Aaron Copland School of Music to a concert titled: An Evening of Women in Song. It was wonderful. I’m ashamed to admit I only knew one of the female composers, Britlin Losee, who I wrote about in my book about singing. That is just plain wrong. All these female composers I’ve never heard of! I googled every one of them and some of them are quite famous!

Hildegard von Bingen (although her name rang a vague bell)
Bianca Maria Meda
Rosephanye Powell
Libby Larson
Gwyneth Walker
Thea Musgrave
Joan Szymko
Laura Farnell
Bernice Johnson Reagon
Ysaye M. Barnell
Rosephanye Powell

My favorite pieces of the night were Britlin’s, which I filmed and uploaded to YouTube, Ysaye M. Barnell’s Sound-bite from Beijing and Bernice Johnson Reagon’s Ella’s Song. Thank you Dr. Sandra Babb and H. Roz Woll (the conductor and assistant conductor) and the Queens College Women’s Choir for such a fabulous night. I’m kicking myself that I didn’t plan this better and bring all my friends. Anyone who wasn’t there really missed out.

That’s one of the titles of my book currently under consideration, and my favorite. Please, please love it marketing department.

American Idol fans: What the hell? You didn’t love Josh??

Buddy is looking too thin, and I was about to take him to the vet, but his eating is picking up, so I’m hoping it was just a bad patch we’re past. It’s so hard, because he does have lymphoma and it’s only a matter of time. I don’t handle it well when I pet dies. It utterly destroys me. God, he does look terribly thin doesn’t he? I don’t want to face this. Poor little thing. Poor us.

It’s a bad angle though, it exaggerates his thinness. He looks better in the shot below this one.

I was poised and ready to take a picture of the attack that was sure to follow, but it didn’t happen.