Stacy Horn

I took this a few weeks ago, while on a walk up the Hudson River.  My first thought was, ‘That’s kinda ugly and tacky,’ and I walked around and learned that the big H on the wall stood for Hustler Magazine.  I have nothing against porn, yay porn, but what can I say?  Perhaps pornographers are not the best decorators.

I like my subway picture below, by the way. It’s very Edward Hopper-esque, don’t you think?  Oh, and before I forget, I posted the missing persons flyer for Hannah Upp, and she has since been found.  From Gothamist: “The Daily News reports that Hannah Upp, the NYC Teaching Fellow missing since August 29, was found hours ago after she ‘jumped into the chilly waters off Staten Island in an apparent suicide attempt.’ The News says Upp ‘jumped off of a pier on the Staten Island side…[and] was found about a mile off Staten Island’s St. George section just before noon.'”

Sad, but not as sad as it could have been.  Meanwhile, the constantly fluctuating headlines about the stock market are driving me crazy.  I’m not going to worry, or rather, I’m trying not to worry.  I tell myself there’s worse things than losing all your money, and plenty of people don’t have any to lose in the first place.  For me the worst is anxiety attacks, and as long as I am not suffering from them, life is a piece of cake. Okay, terminal illness and death is worse. Bottomline, I am not suffereing from any of those so take my money IF YOU MUST.

All my money is invested through Merrill Lynch!

Meanwhile, my original plan was to hole up today and work on the final edits of my book, something that is a pleasure. But fate (who hates me) has intervened and so far I haven’t edit word one.

But Finney checked out okay at the vet so regardless of anything else, all is right with the world, my personal world that is. He doesn’t have diabetes, which was what I feared, and he doesn’t have anything else that could be picked up upon examination or in a blood test.  Maybe I jumped the gun and he’s fine!  That’s what I’m going with for now.

Here is Buddy, hanging out beside me, in a spot where he doesn’t fit.  See how he hangs off the side, like a good third of him?

The fact that everyone voted for Dan to win Big Brother this week gives me hope. He was the one who deserved to win and should have won. But not everyone liked him, in fact some couldn’t stand him. As they talked about who to vote for the ones who disliked him rationalized up a storm about why they should vote for the other guy, Memphis. I thought it was going to be a demonstration of what is to come for us this November, but then Dan won, unanimously. There’s hope!!

I took this last night at the 96th Street subway station.  It reminds me of another reason why I prefer to just walk: I hate waiting for the subway.  Waiting, waiting, waiting.  I’d just as soon walk.  That train in the distance wasn’t my train.  Of course.  The one that arrives right away never is.

Finney didn’t eat well this morning, plus he seems to be hanging around the water bowl, which is never a good sign. I have to get him to the vet. Plus, my doctor didn’t call me back yesterday and I still have to double-check this weird vision thing, although I’m not overly concerned about that. I’m sure it was an ophthalmic migraine.

And I have to get to the gym, I haven’t been since Saturday, I have to work on my book edits, answer my email, call the dentist about mailing a check, track down my UPS package, practice my choir pieces. In other words, I’m feeling very stressed out. Mostly by concern for Finney. If the cats aren’t alright, life is not alright.

This morning I had this bizarre visual distortion in both my eyes, it was so scary.  I struggled to describe it to my doctor, who I called at whenever it happened, 6:30 or 7 this morning.  It was this weird, geometric, zig-zag, prismy effect, very art deco looking.  I told him it was like the Chrysler Building, in a semi-circle, blocking out anything in my field of vision behind it.

Nothing I googled sounded like it, but had I googled “zig-zag” I might have come up with what he thinks it is: an ophthalmic migraine.

Everything I’ve read makes me think he’s right.  It totally sounds like this.  I’m waiting for him to call again when he gets to the office, and he’s going to have me see someone just to make sure.  But I feel less panicked now.

I had planned to post this picture that I took when we were walking down the stairs off the subway yesterday.  Interesting coincidence because the angles are reminiscent of what I saw this morning.