Month: June 2010

I thought Finney was showing signs of getting better, but he is very clearly not improving. We’ve all been up for a couple of hours and he is definitely in pain.

I am once again just waiting for the vet to open. It is just killing me watching him move from spot to spot, crying, trying to find relief. I had one more dose of pain killer left and I gave it to him a few minutes ago. I’m hoping it kicks in soon.

I had one nice moment yesterday. One of the detectives from my previous book about the NYPD’s cold case squad had called the other day about something, and I told him about Finney and he could hear the stress in my voice. Yesterday he called to ask about Finney. He’d just been through something recently with his dog (who is okay) and he knew how horrible it is when your pet is suffering.

I just remembered, there was also a message from my friend Chris who had been following the updates on my blog and knew I must be a wreck!  (I have to call Chris back.  Sorry Chris!)

But I’m trying not to act stressed because I’ve seen how that affects the cats and makes it even worse. My poor little guy.  Oh God.  There’s also the issue of the cost of the sonogram and surgery (it’s the least of my concerns, but still, oh god oh god).

Every year I rediscover that I can see the Hudson River from my roof. I went up there because I could smell fire, but not see it. Fire engines and police cars were swarming an area just southwest of me, so I went up to the roof to see if I could spot it. I couldn’t, but there’s the river, right there.

… when the cat with cancer is the healthy one. Actually, Finney seems a little better to me now. Could the new antibiotics work that fast? He got the first dose, by injection, only five hours ago. But he seems a little better to me. Wait. The pain killers from this morning have probably worn off, so that’s why he seems more himself. Except he should be going to the bathroom every five seconds too, as a result. And he’s not. So he IS better. Oh god. YAY!!

This is Buddy doing what cats do: sitting on my work. I pull out the library book and the notes I’ve been taking in order to transcribe them and as I reach for my water he immediately makes himself comfortable. Guess who didn’t have the heart to move him? The person who pulled out a camera instead.

I am such a basket case right now.

– Finney is sick.

– Every vet visit costs $$$.

– To take care of him I’m staying home.

– But all these days home have cost me $$$ in Census pay.

So I’m anxious about Finney, I’m anxious about money and to make matters worse, I could be using this time to do all the work on my book I’ve been unable to do, but I’ve only gotten a little done each day, never a day’s worth.

Hence: my basket-case-ness. I promise to stop complaining soon.

Finney update: We’re trying a different antibiotic, but if that doesn’t work we’re going to do a ultra-sound to see if there are crystals that didn’t show up in the xray. If that happens he might need surgery. Also, he has advanced arthritis, poor thing. It means he’s probably been in pain for a long time. So we need to start treating that. The arthritis explains his peeing off the side of the box. This is the thing my vet said a lot of cats develop.

Finney woke me up by jumping on the comforter I was sleeping in and peeing on it. He still has a fever, which should have cleared by now. I’m trying not to panic. It could be that we just need to give him a different antibiotic.

I’m waiting for 8:30, when I can call the vet, but I’m supposed to be at the Census at 8, which is not going to happen. I already missed two days. I dread calling them to say I won’t be there yet again, due to a cat (few people understand things like this).

It’s not a matter of life and death, not yet anyway, but he is clearly suffering and I have to do everything I can to alleviate that for him.

UPDATE: The people at the Census were understanding. For the record, every time I’ve called they’ve been very nice and very understanding and told me not to worry and to take care of my cat.